people r so fucking screwed up!!!

many times before...have i asked myself...would it be better to act at the centre of the stage in the spotlight...or hide behind the curtains amidst the shadows?

to shine in the spotlight would give me the opportunity to make a difference in this world...make it a better place...to speak out for what i strongly believe in...to protect everything which i think is right...to revel in the spotlight would provide me the chance to to something for humanity...to aid their cause...n finally, inspire others to do the same...

but to stay in the spotlight would also attract the attention of other people...n with them...a barrage of human characteristics...jealousy...hypocrites...opportunists...back stabbers...n some will have high expectations...to do great things...to succeed...

but to slink amidst the shadows would release me of these high expectations...allowing me to live a simple yet fulfilling life...living only for myself...n not for others...taking each day one step at a time...n experiencing my life to its fullest...

but to skunk in the darkness would also mean sacrificing everything that i uphold...my principles...it would mean not having to speak out against everything that i though is wrong...n allow the world to do as it liked...suffering...death...

yesterday's recent spate of events left me shattered...my principles have been jeopardized...n all because of staying in the spotlight...had i not done so...things would have turned out differently...i would not be feeling so bad right now...i would not hate myself right now or my conscience...n i would not hate everyone in this fucked up world for being so screwed up...

so now...i'm going to change...i shall no longer be at the center of attraction...but i shall fade into obscurity...let the everyone have high expectations of another...let that person live with the high expectations placed on him...n sacrifice his own principles...but give me back my simple life...with my principles that i hold on to firmly...although i condemn myself to oblivion.

people...we're all related

u know what?...everytime i look at people...either my relatives, friends or anyone for that matter...i keep seeing other people in them...don't get it?...well, let me put it this way...everytime i look at someone...he or she will remind me of another person that i know of...it's either the face, speech, behaviour or the person itself...

let's take a few examples...ok let's start with my classmates...first, azam looks (malay) like b (chinese)...(don't worry, i'm not a racist...i'll explain the race later)...they both share that blur look...that half-asleep look...n they're both nocturnal in nature...second, goh looks n acts like heng liang...both look similar on the outside as well as the inside...they both have that studious look n r both extremely brilliant...there's more n in every case...the similarities are uncanny...i won't list all of them however, coz it'll b boring...

but that's beside the point...the thing that interests me is this:...if different ppl...with different races (told u i'd explain it), different families or even different locations (e.g. states, countries, continents)...could look n behave alike...or at least have even the tiniest littlest smallest similarity...this would mean that we're all related one way or another...no matter how distant...in other words...we could say that we r descended from the same parents...the first man n woman...namely Adam n Eve...cool huh?...

p.s. i don't think that evolution could b used to explain this phenomenon...coz then we'd have ppl who have gills or scales or wings for that matter...anywayz...i don't believe in evolution...lol...so there...

"You come of the Lord Adam and the Lady Eve and that's proud enough to lift the head of the lowest beggar and yet, humble enough to bow the head of the highest king."

- Aslan -
- Prince Caspian -
- The Chronicles of Narnia -
- C. S. Lewis-